Back-seat Drivers

Since I was a really little girl I always looked forward to driving. I would pretend to drive all the time and once, I was probably 7, I even made a steering wheel and petals to install in the back seat. I would practice as mom would press the gas and the brake. My dad used to drive a standard car so I would pretend to do the clutch and shift as well. The day I got my drivers' liscense I thought I would never be happier. Not to brag and boast, but I'm relatively certain I am one of the world's top female drivers. Yes, I've run a few red lights, sped a few more times, and had a tiny graze incident with an 18-wheeler, but that was not my fault. I learned how to drive on a Ford F-250. And after driving it for a few years could parallel park it like it was no big deal. Ok. Enough bragging. I'm really just trying establish in your mind that when I'm driving there is no reason to fear for your life...

... Tonight I made my maiden voyage driving in Haiti. We had to run an errand to Bas Limbe to get some supplies for our camp coming up. We've talked about me driving before and everyone seems to be impressed that I have such a cool skill. So we started our journey. Me, Guerline, Boss Varis, Boss Mervil, Johnny, and Windel. Before we got out of the drive way I had a small run-in with a large rock. In my defense, I am not used to large overly monstrous rocks causing me to bottom out... we typically don't have that problem on FM 249. But I did think that maybe not being behind the wheel for 2 months may have made me a little rusty. Whatever, I shook it off.

Once we got on the road that familiar smile came back. The one that I got when I drove for the first time. It kinda creeps up on me and by the time I realize I'm smiling I can't stop. Its actually kindof embarrasing and childish. Whatever, I'm a child. I'm fine with it. We were on the road. I was driving on the wrong side of the road, mainly because there were potholes on my side, and partly because it made me feel like a rebel.

Then the backseat driving began... "Sound your horn." "Go faster!" "See that hole?" "Watch out for the girl on the bike." "slow down." "Don't drive on the shoulder of you'll flip the car over." "Sound your horn." "Sound your horn." "SOUND YOUR HORN."  All of this usually would have made me pull the car over and sarcastically offer for them to drive the car if they think they are so good at it. But here, in a car full of 5 other people that don't know how to drive... that didn't seem like a good idea. Before we even got in the car they all expressed to me the fact that they thought I was going to kill them, except Johnny, he trusted me . I tried to be as sweet as possible and follow their back-seat commands. While we were in our village all the children ran behind us shouting, 'Norel can drive!! NoRel can drive!!" it was adorable. Once we left our village I started getting all the "Blanc" comments. "Haow aaar hough Blanc?" etc.


On the way back from Bas Limbe everyone made comments about how I was a good driver and they weren't scared anymore, but this didn't stop them from back-seat driving . All in all, it was a fun little outing with my friends. I was a little nervous, but I think I did well. There was not much traffic, but it was dark on my way back. So next all I have to do is learn how to manuver in traffic. (I'll let you know how it goes.)

..... AND....Everyone seems to love, (and comment) on the frog stories, so I'll leave you with the last detail of my day. I had just parked the car and everyone was ooing and awing at my parking job (at least that's what they were saying in my head... I wasn't really translating Kreyol at that point...) Everyone had gotten out of the car and I leaned my head out the window to say something and... WET... on my nose. I tried not to panic, and brushed it away a little bit. Laughed to myself, stuck my head back out the window. WET... and crawling... on my nose. Then the panic-startled laugher started. I couldn't figure out what it was or where it when when I flicked it off. Turns out it was a little froggie that loves me. I continued to laugh to myself for about a minute or two thinking how incredibly scared my friend who is afraid of frogs would have been. I'm sure she would have died. So here are my words of widsom for the night... next time you drive, watch out for frogs who decide to jump on your face. And be nice to those in the back-seat... even if they are bossy.

And to all of you who are back-seat drivers.... please stop. Unless you are litterally scared for your life... and speaking Kreyol.