"N'ap tann ou"

My heart is light, but also heavy. God has blessed me so much. So many times this afternoon through tear-filled eyes I exclaimed, "Bondye te beni nou." God has blessed us.

We had our final day of day-camp today. We ended up only getting to have camp for two days instead of three due to Haitian holidays on Wednesday. Camp went wonderfully. The children had a blast as always! Fell in love with the Americans and played their little hearts out.

At the end I asked Peter Marc to give them a little thank you for coming and dissmissal. He said, "I think you can do it." So there I go, to the front of the church to give the dissmissal. I thanked them all for coming and told them that all the Americans were so happy they came to camp to learn about Jesus. I told them that the Americans loved them so much and were so glad to have met them. I then decided that this was probably a good time to announce formally that I was leaving Sunday since it was going to be the last time they were all gathered together with me.

I told them that I was leaving Sunday, to go back to school, so I could come back and live here always. I told them that I would keep them in my heart, but I will miss them so much when I was gone, and every day I'll be praying for them. I started getting a little choked up as I finished talking so I decided to cut it short. I asked the lady that was leading worship to sing "He Has Made Me Glad" because its one of the ones I know and love. As they began to sing, I couldn't help but choke back tears. I bit my lip hard, but the tears came anyway. I couldn't believe this was one of the last times I'll see them all in the near future. I will miss them all more than words can express. I remembered how good and gracious the Lord has been to give me this gift. The gift of knowing Him better, knowing and loving His people fiercely, praising Him for His blessings in two languages. He HAS made me glad!! As I looked through tear-filled eyes at all the faces that were staring at mine I couldn't believe this was actually happening. God has blessed me to give me deep relationships. We may not be able to communicate everything, but we can communicate a lot. I am not leaving strangers, I am leaving sisters and brothers. As the song closed, and Peter Marc prayed, I thanked God for my blessings.

Poupette and Shelove came to hug me and they told me they wanted to sing me a song. They got through the words "Orevwa, zanmi'm..." "Goodbye my friend" then they trailed off and buried their heads in my chest sobbing. I felt like my heart was getting ripped out. These girls love me, and I love them. We are friends, we are sisters. They are two of the girls I've known for the longest. I remember them both from my first trip here in 2007. I've seen them grow and mature even since I got here in January. We hugged and cried for almost a full minute, then they pulled away and tried to escape. I looked up and saw tears filling the eyes of face I saw, some already had spilled over and were streaming down the faces of both adults and children.

I couldn't believe they were crying. I knew I would cry, but I did not expect for them to cry. Until today I don't think I'd seen a Haitian cry; they are a tough people. Now I have seen tear stains on the faces of most of my friends here. Colas pulled me aside and comforted me, "We know you are coming back. N'ap Tann ou (we'll be waiting for you). You need to go now so you can go to school and come back to live here. We love you. We know you love us. N'ap Tann ou."  I looked at the faces of my friends. I kept saying over and over again, "Bondye te beni nou!" "God has blessed us!" I told them how blessed I was to know them and call them my friends. There were hugs all around and many tears. My heart loves these people more than I can even describe. Even as I type the words on the screen are starting to blur from tears forming. I can't imagine how much its going to hurt to leave them on Sunday. But God knows. He's preparing me. He's given me this blessing. He's put me in this place for this time. He'll give me what I need to make it. Its never easy to leave Haiti. But I've finished the task I was called to do. I need to go to school, and prepare for the next trip.

My goal for the entire time I lived here was to show love. That was always my motto and theme. I wanted the people I came in contact with to know that I love them always. Today I told a bunch of them, "You know I'll always love you!"  They all responded with a resounding, "oui!"  As I was leaving, a few of them started singing the song, "I have a friend who really loves me, who loves me, who loves me! I have a friend who really loves me, and Norell is her name."  Praise Christ. Praise the one who has poured His love into my heart and caused love to overflow. Praise the One who can free them from slavery to the enemy and give them freedom and eternal life in His Son! Praise the One who loves. Praise Him for His blessings. Praise Him for the blessing of friendship. Praise Him, for I know I will see many of these faces in Heaven, if not on earth!

I can't wait to see my friends and family back home and hug the ones I love, and I can't wait to come home to Haiti. I know they will be waiting!